as told by her.♥

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

feed the hamster, make it run on the wheel

it kept me entertained for awhile,hope it does the same for you.

Monday, March 30, 2009

The Paradox of Our Age

The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider Freeways, but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness.

We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom.
We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.

We’ve learned how to make a living, but not a life. We’ve added years to life not life to years. We’ve been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space. We’ve done larger things, but not better things.

We’ve cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We’ve conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We’ve learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more informa tion, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less.

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit delete…

Remember; spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever.
Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side.
Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because t hat is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn’t cost a cent.
Remember, to say, ‘I love you’ to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you.
Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again.

Give time to love, give time to speak! And give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind.

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away…

(its a message forwarded to me)

Sunday, March 29, 2009

For some strange reasons, Saturdays turns out to be utterly dreadful days for me.
especially when i'm stuck at home doing nothing, and start mourning over my pathetic self.

Yours truly missed out on work today(yet again), i swear i did not know that i was on schedule today.
-or so it wasnt exactly on the schedule book, not to point fingers, benefit of doubt given-
woke up to the buzzing on my handphone,"NYDC" wasnt exactly the name i want to see flashed up on my screen.
Nevertheless, picked it up, and it was W..

Brenda: in a sleepy voice, "hello?"

W: " you sleeping uh?"

Brenda: "yes, why?" (mentally:' please do not tell me im wrking ")

W:" you know you working at 11am today?"

Brenda: *takes the phone away from ear, look at time: 11.19am* "huh, but i checked yesterday leh"

W: *meanwhile mumbled something to the manager*

Brenda:" then now how? do i go to work now? its going to take FOREVER for me to go down"

W:" manager says nevermind then"

*Brenda apologises and went back to sleep*

sidenote// yes i do know that it was very irresponsible of me.

but i really wasnt aware of my shift today.

cross my heart.

During the whole span of my sleep in the morning, i remembered waking up to several things.I remember-ed texting Bestf about Starbucks @ Nov or something, then it was some random 'Good-Morning' messages which i replied to (i think?), then it was texting CS to tell her Bucksy is cancelled,then it was texting Chunfu about Sembawang Shopping Centre and Taste of Thailand. And yes, i was sleeping while waiting for the replies, so all the replies were-honestly-i-dont-remember-exactly-kinda replies.

ahhhh~ another confession,i was late to meet Chunfu and the rest.

but nope, i wasnt the latest.

after waking up at say 4.30, like i mean completely awake and conscious!

i continued texting Chunfu,either that or i got the time wrong?

he told me he would be heading down early to queue, which was perfectly normal because he lived in Yishun and the queue of ToT is ridiculously long for God knows what reasons.

i texted Reggy and yes made plans to meet him then, time check :17.24

(silently thinking to myself, steady, i wont be late, and still have got time to collect my lenses)

i gave Chunfu a text, "i go shower then meet you hor, dont say not good"

his reply was nothing but an "orh"

prolly in his heart he went like, this girl, talk only.

meanwhile, i was already in the midst of preparation.and guess what, by the time i was done, it was 1800

totally flabbergasted.

so i rushed out of my place, with Reggy on the line, so he could meet me at the bus stop.

after 20 long minutes, the bus still didnt arrive.

BLARDY FUCKING LONG I TELL YOU

me and Reggy was in a discussion on whether should me take a cab down.

just at that moment, the bus arrived!

and Kailing arrived at 2000

(i just had to say it,we were supposed to meet at 1830)

honestly, im very sick of desperately trying to bore myself by narrating my day's event.

and i no longer wish to continue..

lastly,

do not look upon me with scorn and pity,im just plain bored.

(and i dint get to collect my lenses)

Friday, March 27, 2009

i thought you were the desserts which i could do with or without,

until now, i realised you are the main course which i want.

just a rant, dont read too much into it people.

Sunday, March 22, 2009

BRAVURA, its 5.29am and i cannot seem to get to sleep somehow.

Was it the Liat Towers visit with bff and gang just now?

MORE HELP NEEDED

yup, no misreading.

with absolutely nothing on my mind, i went to bed at 2am.However 3 hours and 45 mins later, im still as awake as ever.

staring at the ceiling of my room, and the screen of my lappy.Nerina Pallot's been playing forever, but no soothing of my nerves.Im all fidgety.And i dont know why, who ,what or how i end up feeling this through the day.Not exactly very exciting to feel pricky for the whole day.Brownie and ice cream settled me through work as the dinner crowd came and left.And i swear im suffering the after effect.Im not lonely even though im alone, im empty.

My heart has only got space for one.

You dont call because i rang,you call because you care.You wanted to know more, more about the person you chose to walk away from.The same person you turned your back upon, with a heart so cold.Unmoved the feelings sstayed, almost stagnant i could say.

bite me

bite the dust

❤

Friday, March 20, 2009

well, i dont know what to do man, results' coming out in say 3hours.and im so dead.Having to face dismissal is nothing exciting.i dont know what to do if i really get dismissed.Crying-might be an option.Dying is another.Then again, i aint that kinda that would actually just do thing irrationally.

LIfe's been a bitch these days.Havent exactly got peace for a very long time.Been bumming around whole day, at home.Its either that or goign out to spend moolah.Talking about moolah, i need them bad.So they could be used to fund my shopping,i havent exactly been shopping much, but who doesnt love shopping.( freaks that doesn't -please shut up, comments not needed) i want my ALDO shoes,and bags, and that 90 bucks flip flops still! I've been having this scrimmage thing going on within myself over the past months about that dumb flipflop.Need or want? Its as if its calling out to me, compulsion to get it, then again, its a luxury to have.THIS DOES NOT LOOK LIKE ITS GOING TO END ANYTIME SOON THOUGH.Somehow i shouldnt even be ranting about such stuff at this time, im supposed to feel anxious about my results.Not that i am not, but its just that i think i am too strung out to get the words to come out in order.This is bad, i feel as if ive got my heart in my mouth and im sweating like a bullet.Oooh, i just spenr the previous 3 sentences faltering about how i feel towards the release of results.

IT JUST LIKE A MENTAL COUNDOWN..What if you know when you die? What if you know when are you going to fall in love, when are you falling out of it? Would life still be as interesting? Would you look forward to another dawn? Would you? FOOD FOR THOUGHT.

DO YOU KNOW, im typing under my comforter? Its so cold in my room its about 18 deg, and im lazy to reach for the controller nor crawl to switch off the fan.I'd rather just die here, 80% positive.

Not exactly sure if i should sleep or wait up for the results.I just cannot make up my mind.Dear mind,i think i know whats the feeling of losing you now.its losing the ability to process and all information failed to be retained during the transaction period from your boay parts to the brain.

The queainess is obviously getting to me already, i felt as if my tummy just did a thousand somersaults with butterflies, forming somekind of butterfly milkshake.Lethargy is taking over now.Gosh, my brain is not working straight, its cannot even decide how it wants me to feel, so much for will power, and mind over matter.

Its time for me to go find my peter pan, where i will be tinkerbell in together with him in never never land~

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

haughty, high-and-mighty, insolent, lofty, lordly, overbearing, overweening, prideful, proud, supercilious, superior

grandiose, hoity-toity, pretentious, puffed-up, puffy

"i might have fallen for you"

oh, mr king

i have changed, i confess

Sunday, March 15, 2009

king kong KLANG!!

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

there are some things you just don't question

and some words that you dont say.

people that you dont bother

when you say you wouldnt care

somethings are better left the way it is

never to be found, unrecorded sins

im betting on desire

im betting on deceit

im looking back on moment when everthing is sweet

having bet on indifference

having bet on my belief

having bet on the beauty, when all is complete

once mr king, i loved you as a kid

kissed your face before i slept

be in my head when i sleep

but now all that lingers,is the scent of the boy

that i never would get, despite how hard i try

my mouth will not speak.

for im all weary and weak

and so i asked in every line

that i might learn of your designs

if you think its unfair,just let me know

write it down ,and then go.

make your way out of my world

take the plunge and the twirls

give the stars the very sign

put it in the bottle,let the thoughts die

tell everyone you were never mine

with all the memories left behind

bring with you all desires and lust

your were nothing but the past

ive been scarred but i aint bitter

when you made your grand departure

go on for your perfect life

with flaws you smeared with lies

a hundred thousand days to go

the million stories left untold

looking for the person lost inside

so very hard and i still cant find

then an angel said to me,

walk away, not otherwise

somethings are better left the way it is

with unknown feelings and a twist

better buried six feet under

never to be heard and never whispered

brend~

the final straw

oh brenda ❤ she swears she's gonna make it. says:
THATS WHY MC DELIVERY
WKAILING says:
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA
mac: 'Address please?"
we: "mount faber, thanks"
mac: "Sorry?"
we: "ya mount faber (what you stupid or what)"
macs: "erm ok.... Mount faber where"
we: "some grass patch. ok tell you what, you reach already. just follow the sound of laughter. Especially the exceptionally loud and high pitch ones. ZUN CAN FIND US"

MCDELIVERY CONVERSATION.

Wednesday, March 04, 2009